


One Sided

by somethingaboutamoose



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Cunnilingus, F/M, Fingering, Humor, M/M, Sexual Humor, Smut, Welcome Back, and the rest of the team is scarred for life, but this also has fun relationship stuff, in which the loverbirds are loud, like all that heterosexual sex stuff, mid terms, mostly shitty/lardo, so not JUST smut, y'know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-06-07 12:46:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6805129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somethingaboutamoose/pseuds/somethingaboutamoose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Looking from the outside, Shitty and Lardo's relationship can seem one-sided, but the two of them (and their poor, poor teammates) are witnesses that it is anything but that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Sided

**Author's Note:**

> I had two ideas for a post today. One required for me to know something about hockey while the other one required me to know something about sex. 
> 
> I know nothing about either of these things. 
> 
> So here we go.

Anyone outside looking in could describe Shitty and Lardo’s relationship in certain way; one sided. They denied it, but everyone could see that the sentimental role in the relationship leaned slightly left towards Shitty. 

Shitty was affectionate, especially once Lardo and him became official. He would call her pet names, write her love letters, kiss her in public, all that jazz. The only catch is that Lardo did not reciprocate. 

Now, she didn't push it away, ask him to stop, no, none of that. She just...didn't react. 

For example: 

Shitty often greets Lardo with a sun rise text, “Good morning, my dove.”

To which Lardo responds with, “Sup,” 

And one morning while visiting, Shitty stood up on his chair while they were out at dinner and recited a poem that he had written and memorized. It was very elegantly put (a wonderful eight stanza with alternating couplets) and even if he was trying to be an ass, it did sound like it came from the heart. Once he finished, Lardo didn’t react much less acknowledge it was for her. Yes, she listened respectfully however she simply went right back to eating afterwards. 

Shitty would come around, kiss Lardo on the cheek, give her hugs from behind, but she never seemed to make the first move or make the favors equal. Unless you knew them, you may assume that Shitty was but a stranger, planting kisses on Lardo as a practical joke. Which, for Shitty, probably wasn’t too far from the ordinary. 

Sometimes Jack would ask Shitty how he knows that Lardo still likes him, “I can’t go a day without wondering if Bitty actually still has feelings for me,” Jack admitted, “I need some validation from time to time, you know?”

Shitty grinned, “Don’t worry about me, Jack. It may not seem like it, but Lardo often speaks her mind.”

Which could be debated as true. 

“Shitty! Oh, fuck, I love you so much,” Lardo screamed. 

This may have been influenced by the fact that Shitty currently had his face in-between Lardo’s legs, tongue working wonders. Wonders that Lardo certainly appreciated. 

“Ah!” Lardo yelped, “Fuck, don’t use your teeth!”

Shitty grinned before gently grazing his front teeth down the skin of her clit before taking it into his mouth and sucking. 

“Ah,” Lardo said again, however in a different tone this time, “That....you can do that.”

Shitty chuckled, while still eating her out, he dragged his nails up and down her thighs. Not pressing, but merely gliding, enough to making goosebumps rise and her heart rate with it. Lardo laid her hands over Shitty’s guiding his touch across her skin, over her stomach, until they were resting on her breasts. Shitty smirked and got up from his spot between Lardo’s legs and crawled over her. 

They stared at each other for a moment. They were laying on Lardo’s bed in the Haus, what used to be Shitty’s bed. Lardo was completely naked, while Shitty remained in his briefs, although they didn’t expect that to last much longer. Lardo stretched herself underneath Shitty, hovering over her. 

Lardo reached up and ran her thumb on Shitty’s bottom lip, “You look exceptional tonight, my dear.”

“Are you saying that because you mean it, or because you want to cum?” Shitty said. 

Lardo shrugged, “Why can’t it be both?”

Shitty shook his head, “Look at you, taking advantage of me like I’m your whore,” and scooted back slightly and bent down to attach himself on Lardo’s breasts. 

Lardo mewled and Shitty sucked, bit, and kissed, while her hands tugged on his hair.

There was a knock on the door. 

“Uh, guys?” winced the small, innocent Chowder, “Could you, um, keep it down?”

Shitty and Lardo heard him, of course they did, but they didn’t acknowledge it. Shitty was moving his mouth over Lardo’s chest, gently moving up to give open-mouthed kisses to Lardo’s shoulders and neck. 

Lardo took a deep, shaky breath as Shitty moved his hand down, rubbing circles and occasionally dropping a finger in between her folds. 

“Ahh,” Lardo said once more, except this time, strung out and dire, as Shitty began slipping fingers inside of her. 

“The-the, uh, Holster, Ransom, and Bitty all took a vote, and-and they said I had to be the one to tell you guys to be quiet,” Chowder tumbled out from the other side of the door, “and we love you visiting, Shitty, but, if you guys could just...uh...keep it down? That’ll be great. Thanks.” 

As Shitty began the routine of caressing Lardo on the inside with two fingers and rubbing the tip of her clit with his thumb, Lardo raked her nails on his back. Shitty still was kissing across her collarbones, gently, as contrary to what he was doing with his hands. 

“Oh, oh, Shit-Shitty, I’m gonna…” Lardo word’s went off as a nearly soundless moan came from her, biting her bottom lip. Her back arched, and Shitty put one hand under to hold her still while he worked her through her orgasm with the other. 

Lardo clinged onto Shitty, body pulsing, legs twitching, “Ah, ah,” She said, in a completely different tone as the last few times, utterly involuntary and breathless, as Shitty didn’t stop. If anything, he moved faster. 

Which killed Lardo. And amused Shitty, “Round two?” He said, calm as ever. 

Lardo couldn’t do anything but whimper, “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” 

And there was hardly a break in between the two rounds, and the only ‘break’ was Shitty taking his hand away for a split second to lick the cum that was covering his fingers before going right back to work. 

Outside the room, Chowder was standing awkwardly a few feet away from the door. Ransom, Holster, and Bitty had all congregated at the top of the staircase. 

“Don’t they know that we are here?” Bitty said. 

“I don’t think they care,” Ransom replied. 

Holster shook his head, “I’m not one to get in the way of true love, but I have a midterm tomorrow and I can hear them loud and clear from the attic.” 

Chowder looked completely lost as he called to the other boys, “I...I don’t know what to do here.”

After Lardo could get her breath back, she looked up at Shitty, eyes’ half-lidded, “C’mere,” 

Lardo got up and straddled Shitty, kissing him fully on the mouth. Shitty wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer. 

Suddenly, Lardo pulled away, looking concerned, “Do you...do you really feel like I’m taking advantage of you? Because that’s...that’s not what this is. At least, that’s not what I want this to be. And I know I’m not good with expressing myself but…”

Shitty grinned and kissed Lardo sweetly, “I know, and I understand. That’s just something to work on. Don’t expect to stop what I’ve been doing, unless, of course, you want me to.”

Lardo shook her head, and blushed, “No, I...I actually like it.”

“Fucking knew it.”

Lardo huffed and slipped out of Shitty’s arms, ran her hands down his chest, over his thighs and took her turn bent down between his legs. 

“Do you know what I also like?” Lardo teased. 

“Do tell.” Shitty replied as Lardo stripped him of his sanity with her nails and teeth. 

At around 12:56pm that night, Jack Zimmermann got a phone call from Bitty. 

“Hey, Bits,” Jack answered, “It's late, is everything okay?”

“You are in a hotel near Samwell, right?” Bitty questioned. 

“Uhm, yeah. I was gonna surprise you for winter break but…”

“Cool, great, the folks and I are going to come over to spend the night. That okay?” 

“What? I mean, it’s has two beds, but don’t you have classes tomorrow morning? And what’s wrong with the Haus?”

Bitty, with nearly no emotion besides a twinge of frustration stated, “Shitty. Lardo. Sex. Mid-terms.” 

“I’ll send you the address.”


End file.
